Top Tip #9
Tip: Don’t just drift aimlessly day by day in life; instead make your life more useful and purposeful by training yourself in the life skill of GOAL SETTING.
LEVEL 1 – The training technique
The life skill of goal setting involves creating and maintaining short term goals (up to 6 months from now), mid term goals (6 months to 5 years from now), and long term goals (10 years from now, then 20, 30, 40, and on). The goals need to be doable, measurable, and overall, you should want to do them, even if you don’t feel like it. They should reflect your priorities, morals and values for the good of life. Of course, they can be adjusted or altered as your life evolves.
I hope you recall and have been practicing dealing with events as they occur in your life with the procedure we have been developing with our life skills: Stop – Relax – think (properly).
The life skill of goal setting adds another skill piece to the procedure which now becomes:
Stop – Relax – Think – Do ……..
This means that it is smart not to do anything until you have thought properly enough about what to do, time permitting, of course. Sometimes the best thing to do or say is nothing. In general the thing to do in your life is to have good goals and to pursue them. Launch yourself away from the problems and issues that the particular life skill empowers you to rise above and leave behind.
LEVEL 2 – The training tool template
Label a blank page at the top with the heading: “Goal Setting.”
At the top of the page on the left hand side, write the heading Short term goals – for today, then under that, for this week, then for this month, then for 6 months from now.
Then halfway down the page on the left hand side write Mid term goals – by 1 year from now, then below that, 2 years from now, then 3,4, and 5 years from now. A bit lower down on the left hand side of the page write Long term goals – by 10 years, then 20, 30, 40, 50 years from now.
Fill in goals for each time frame. It helps to achieve goals if you make a deadline for each one which can be adjusted as time goes along. Every morning review your goals and plan the day accordingly.
LEVEL 3 – Try a trial test and see what happens
Making To DO lists each day as we described in top tip #6 for the life skill of setting priorities is a good place to start with the life skill of goal setting “for today.” Continue with a daily to-do list and set in motion pursuing a goal to be achieved within 6 months.
LEVEL 4 – The target
I recommend that you aim at having enough goals to keep the days of your life busy enough to avoid long spells of dissociation (Top Tip # 5) and, that by always moving forward towards your goals, you are able to experience a purposeful, productive, and fulfilling life with a sense of worthiness and achievement.
LEVEL 5 – Typical cases in point
Many people drift through life with absent or insufficient goals. Many say they are going through life “day by day.” There is some wisdom in living day by day, but by itself, can create an existential problem because then life does not proceed anywhere. Often these are folks spending too much time in dissociation as we discussed in Top Tip #5.
LEVEL 6 – The theory
Goals are an essential ingredient for how life works the best. We are biologically equipped, (with hands, legs, and such) like the machines we invent, to do work. A way to make your life useful and purposeful is to set goals that aim at what you want to accomplish, achieve, and experience for the rest of your life. Goals reflect your values and who you really are as a person and provide a source of hope for the future.
An underlying question is: What is the purpose of life in general and specifically what is your purpose in the reality in which you exist? A tiny number of people have shared with me that they experienced a “calling” to some work, which to them is a mission. A minister and a teacher were examples. It is obvious to me that most people, including myself, do not have any such experience to guide them. This means to me that any individual’s purpose is a personal choice to make. A good question to start thinking about purpose and good goals is: what good can I do that needs to be done? Then you can give yourself the job of doing that good. This should lead to establishing goals that, in pursuing them, would provide you with a sense of use and purpose for your life and a good legacy for you.
LEVEL 7 – Try more tests and trials
There will be many opportunities to consider taking on new goals and challenges. They may not metaphorically fall in your lap, so you may need to go out and find some goals. On the other hand, remember that you can’t take on too many goals. The life skill of setting priorities (Tip #6), and staying balanced Tip #4 are also essential in the life skill of goal setting.
LEVEL 8 – Tracking improvement
The training tool we described in Level 2 should give you a picture of your progress that you can monitor as time goes along. Having deadlines helps to conceptualize whether you are on track or falling behind.
LEVEL 9 – Take off
Use this life skill to launch yourself away from the problems it can help you solve or resolve and to go on to a better way of living in which you can feel good and function well. Make an extensive list of the specific problems and issues this life skill empowers you to rise above and leave behind. Visualize yourself doing so.
LEVEL 10 – Texts for this topic
For further considerations on this topic I can recommend you read.
