Top Tip #4
T ip: Don’t live off kilter in any way; instead, establish and maintain balance in all things as a major part of training yourself in the life skill of CREATING ORDER.
LEVEL 1 – The training technique
When things are going wrong in your life, assess the trouble and problems in terms of imbalances as the cause. Work at correcting any such imbalances by doing the opposite until you get back to the balance point.
LEVEL 2 – The training tool template
Make a chart with two vertical columns. Label the column on the left as “areas of my life in a mess, chaos or off balance” Label the right hand column as “action plan to achieve the goal of creating order by establishing balance.” Proceed to fill out the chart as a template for what needs to be done to put your functions and affairs into balance. Often what needs to be done is the opposite of what has been done to excess. In areas of your life that are not working well due to imbalance, try thinking about creating better balance by reducing excesses and filling deficiencies. An example might be stress due to being too unassertive and the solution is to restore or establish balance by being more assertive, as we discussed in life skill #3.
LEVEL 3 – Try a trial test and see what happens
Sometimes the goal of balancing your life and putting it all in order can seem daunting. Fortunately, even a small success in putting a piece of it in order can be gratifying, and success builds the will and desire for more success. Start a trial somewhere that needs balancing, organizing, or cleaning. The following are some suggestions where you might start:
If you have a room that is in a mess, try putting even a small part, like a table top, back in order and see how that works for you. That way, little by little, you can start the process of turning any chaos in your life around into balance and order.
Try organizing your time management better.
LEVEL 4 – The target goal
The goal here is to become a person always close to the balance point in all things for the sake of creating order in the form of stability and balanced functioning in your life. Everyone has heard of the obvious value of balancing work and play. In real life there are probably hundreds of other balances that deserve attention and servicing when necessary for proper function and stability.
LEVEL 5 – Typical cases in point
Many of my patients find themselves in a black hole of chaos in many areas of their lives, due to such problems as disorganization and imbalances, often because they have overdone a good thing.
LEVEL 6 – The Theory
Creating order is the interaction you want to have with your reality and the criteria for the goals you choose to pursue.
Order in Nature takes the form of balance in structure and function. Balance is the way order works. Extremes that go beyond the balance point lead to chaos in the form of disorder and dysfunction. This means that too much of anything, even something good, can lead to imbalances, dysfunction and disorder. In other words, paradoxically, after the point of too much of even a good thing, more of it makes things worse. Theoretically, balance and order can be restored by doing the opposite.
Most balances have the form of two bipolar opposites with a balance point somewhere in between. All of our 10 life skills are inherently a form of balance within bipolar opposites. For example the life skill of relaxation is achieving some balance between relaxation and tension. Being too relaxed and passive can be a problem on the opposite side of being too tense. Sometimes the balance point is not exactly in the middle. For an adult, the balance between work and play may be more weighted on the work side of the balance, whereas for children, more weighted on the play side.
We perceive all of Nature as being in the form of either order or chaos, or a mixture of both. Life itself is a form of order and anything that promotes order, such as balance is good for life in general and you in particular. The concepts of balance, order, good, and life are all closely tied together. In other words, the state of order (balance in structure and function) is good for life (including yours) and anything good for life is good for order. Conversely, chaos and imbalance is bad for life. Unfortunately, order is hard to make and easy to break (into chaos).
Chaos and imbalance makes us feel bad, whereas order is a stimulus for good emotions and feelings. There is a tendency for people to keep things going in the direction established towards either order or chaos. If things are in order, one thing out of order can look and feel uncomfortable. Picture a beautiful beach except for one small pile of garbage, or even one empty beer bottle someone left. That makes me feel like picking up the garbage and put it where it belongs. On the other hand, if you start to let more and more things become messy, it seems easier to ignore the mess or even add to it. Trials of converting chaos in your life into order, improving order in the order you have, or creating new order is most likely to be beneficial and also emotionally pleasing to you.
LEVEL 7 – Try more tests and trials
The life skill of creating order for good in your life can be applied in many, many useful ways to you entire life, besides the principle of “balance in all things.” Examples might be organizing your life, putting your things in order, creating new order or beauty, and so on.
LEVEL 8 – Tracking your progress
There are often no precise measurements for life balances, but guesstimates can be tracked. Perhaps your tool template for training in this life skill at Level 2 can reflect your progress over time.
LEVEL 9 – Take off
Use this life skill to launch yourself away from the problems it can help you solve or resolve and to go on to a better way of living in which you can feel good and function well. Make an extensive list of the specific problems and issues this life skill empowers you to rise above and leave behind. Visualize yourself doing so.
LEVEL 10 – Texts for this topic
For further reading on balance and creating order, I can recommend
